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This week's editorial

Editor Joan Ritchie's editorial from this week's issue of The Moose Jaw Express
Editorial by Joan Ritchie

It seems the suppression we are feeling during this pandemic is stifling our sense of ha- ha. Life is getting far too serious and we all need to lighten up a bit; humour is the best medicine. Here is a list of random goofy things to ponder that might bring a smile to your face or even a chuckle…

  • Quicksand works slowly.
  • Boxing rings are square.
  • Tell a man that there are 400 billion stars, and he’ll believe you. Tell him a bench has wet paint, and he has to touch it.
  • How can a SLIM CHANCE and a FAT CHANCE be the same, while a WISE MAN and a WISE GUY are opposites?  
  • Why do feet smell and noses run?
  • Why is QUITE A FEW the same as QUITE A LOT?
  • How does a building burn up as it burns down?
  • Why do you fill out a form by filling it in?
  • Why does your alarm go off by going on?
  • How come SUPERMAN could stop bullets with his chest, but always ducked when someone threw a gun at him?
  • Why is it called a HAMBURGER, when it’s made out of BEEF?
  • What would a chair look like, if your knees bent the other way?
  • IF “Con” is the Opposite of “Pro”, then what is the opposite of PROGRESS?
  • How much deeper would the ocean be, if SPONGES didn’t grow in it?
  • Why buy a product that it takes 2,000 flushes to get rid of?
  • Why do we wait until a PIG is dead, to “CURE” it?
  • Why do we put SUITS in a Garment Bag, and put Garments in a Suitcase?
  • If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap?
  • Why doesn’t GLUE stick to the inside of the bottle?
  • Why don’t sheep shrink when it rains?
  • Should vegetarians eat animal crackers?
  • If the cops arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
  • If vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat?
  • Why do we drive on the parkway and park in the driveway?
  • If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
  • Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
  • If you choke a Smurf, what colour does it turn?
  • What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
  • How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
  • Why is it that a writer writes, but fingers don’t fing, grocers don’t groce, humdingers don’t hum, and hammers don’t ham?
  • Why do you recite at a play but you play at a recital?


The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author, and do not necessarily reflect the position of this publication.