Parading national pride

When it comes to Canada Day celebrations, the Liarton Ladies Auxiliary (LLA) has stayed with the status quo. Fireworks at night follow the usual local entertainers on stage, and of course the ever-present Beer Garden. 

This year, the LLA decided to try some different events to spark some fun and patriotism, beginning with an early morning three-on-three ball hockey game. It was to be a three-on-three hockey tournament, but registration only produced 10 players, including two of the Ladies Auxiliary, so the teams were divided evenly. It turned out to be a mildly entertaining event with no fights or brawls.

The Beer Garden was opened early with the bagpiping in of the keg, similar to the piping in of the haggis on Robbie Burns Day. The pancakes and bacon were spectacular and much better tasting than haggis.

Later in the morning, you could hear the sounds of the parade getting organized with the two marching bands tuning and prepping for the mile-long hike. The parade was a new event for Liarton. In order to make it seem longer, the route goes from one end of town to the four-way stop sign where it does a U-turn and returns to the start.

The two Marching bands were at each end of the procession, with the Scratch Creek High School Band (14 members) leading the way. Our local “Kazoo Marching Band” made up of Liartonites ranging in age from six years to a spry 84-year-old brought up the rear. The Liartonites were an unusual marching band, as we all played the same instrument (kazoos) and called ourselves “The Liarton Precision Lawn Chair Team and Kazoo Marching Band.” Quite a mouthful!  

The 11 of us had the greatest time ever and our lawn chair maneuvers, along with our tooting of the only song in our repertoire, “Seventy-six Trombones,” may have made us crowd favorites. It didn’t hurt that the crowd was all our families. I wonder if we could turn pro?

Sandwiched in-between the two bands were the usual business and club floats, including a troop of clowns, who did the clean up after the Gymkhana riders went by. As a marcher a few spots behind the horses, I was very grateful for the clown’s efforts.  To be able to make picking-up horse-poopy funny is a rare talent. It was politely suggested, that for the next parade, the horses could bring up the rear and the kazooers could concentrate on kazooing and not sidestepping “stains” on the road. 

Perhaps the most interesting group in the parade was the five seniors and their “souped”-up electric wheelchairs and scooters. They gave the precision lawn chair team a run for the money, in terms of crowd favoritism. While our lawn chair “moves” were made up on the spot (we called it jamming) the five scooter riders, who called themselves “The Heck’s Angels,” were well-rehearsed and even had “drag races” during their “performance.” 

The electric vehicles were not really souped-up, but were highly decorated, including ornate helmets. The beautiful smiles on the “gang's” faces showed the crowd how happy the seniors were to be able to participate. Rumour has it that next year the three-on-three hockey will be replaced with the Heck’s Angel’s drag races. At my age, I may be using a scooter by then. I wonder if I could join the club and what hazing I need to suffer in order to get my colours?

Canada Day is a beautiful day to celebrate a beautiful country. To be honest, I can hardly wait for it each year. Congratulations to the organizers of all Canada Day parties.