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Landslide Laughs?

Dale "bushy" Bush talks about a landslide and a missed opportunity to sell bumper stickers
DownOnTheCorner_DaleBush
Down on the Corner by Dale "bushy" Bush
traffic gamesArt by Dale "bushy" Bush
In a way, I was happy the road was blocked by some emergency vehicles because a moment or two earlier we could have been swept down the mountainside by a snow driven landslide. Fortunately, no one was hurt by the huge avalanche. A video made of the event made the national news and with good reason, this was a biggie. I was also happy to postpone this shopping trip to the city and postpone spending my moolah.

We were stuck in the schmozzle of what was, basically, a parking lot, as the police detoured the traffic a few miles behinds us. Those of us at the head of two jam-packed lanes waited for our opportunity to escape by turning around and fleeing in the opposite direction of the landslide. It was estimated that it would be at least two hours before we would be able to move an inch, so I did what Canadians are supposed to do in a situation like this…I got my hockey stick and tennis ball out. But as much as I got smiles and encouragement, I did not get anyone to go one-on-one with me or anyone willing to be a goalie…sigh, that might have made the national news as well.

Without any I-gadgets or smart-thingys, we became bored silly waiting in the car, so Mrs. B and I decided to walk up to the landslide and give advice on how to manage the situation. That was my plan, but my bride politely suggested that those in charge might not appreciate my vast wisdom. She said I would be wiser to be a bystander…a silent bystander. Our casual walk was along the right ditch which was deep enough to prevent any vehicles from turning around but allowed us to safely pursue one of our favorite travel games…Bumper Snickers! Reading and commenting on bumper stickers and window decals.

The game began with my Bride spying a now familiar window decal on the mini-van ahead of us, indicating a four-member stick family (Dad, Mom and two brothers) and a stick dog (with stick fleas) next to a stick cat…chasing a stick mouse down a stick hole. This is not that unusual a window sticker. I think that mini-van salesguys will throw in a custom stick family window decal to seal the deal.

The next notable bumper sticker was an obvious Canadian sticker on a beat up 4x4 that stated, “When in doubt…play hockey!” Well, I went down that road and tried but could not find any takers, not even the guy with the hockey bumper sticker…sigh. Another bumper sticker that made me giggle was an oldie but goody and kind of hits home…”Dyslexics are Teople Poo.” This one is funny to a lot of folks who have stayed up late at night wondering if there really is a Dog?

Surprisingly, there does not seem to be as many bumper stickers as there used to be, and when you look at some of the new cars I think I know the reason. There are no “bumpers” any more, or at least obvious bumpers.  The vehicles that do have bumpers seem to be the “large and getting larger” pickup trucks, but those bumpers make it easy to read bumper stickers because they are at eye level. I think this would be a good bumper sticker slogan for those trucks (and drivers)…“I Have a Big 4x4 Truck…So I Must Be a Good Driver.” Can you tell I do not have a big 4x4 truck and may have a peeve about the way they are driven?

We were stuck for over three hours with hundreds of cars…I know I could have sold hundreds of “I Survived the 2019 Landslide Traffic Jam” bumper stickers…maybe next time.    

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