Quite by accident, I am the Village of Fern Valley mayor and council. It’s a small village. Airn’t much to do. Mostly sign papers at the Village office, open only two days a week and listening to complaints.
Our constant complainer is the now proper ‘Mrs. Margaret Abernethy-Flaxcombe.’ I knew her and Ross for years – back when she was called Peggy. They farmed near Ormiston, south east of here. We wasn’t close – just friendly. I attended Ross’ funeral a couple of years ago. Soon after that Peggy transferred the farm to their youngest and moved into Fern Valley.
Peggy changed after Ross died. She’s no longer ‘Peggy’ and insists folks call her Margaret. And she hyphenated her last name. Old Peggy is now Mrs. Margaret Abernethy-Flaxcombe.
With that name change come the attitude change. In her now ‘proper’ way Mrs. Margaret Abernethy-Flaxcombe complains about the Village and how its run. She don’t like how or when garbage picked up – don’t like the kids hang around the store – there’s only six kids – or the main street potholes and dogs. The woman hates dogs.
Margaret acts like the Queen of England, has ‘afternoon teas’ for the ladies and is their spokesman for complaints. She also got herself elected the president of the Rough Patches Quilting Club.
She has one good quality. Mrs. Margaret Abernethy-Flaxcombe is the best quilter south of Chamberlain. I kid you knot (a little play on words).
She has raised the quality of quilting to a new level. She will not accept sub-standard work. Being bossy comes natural. She insists the Quilt Club make the best quilts in Saskatchewan.
The first quality test for the Rough Patches Quilting Club was at the Moose Jaw quilting show. They won several awards and Margaret took First Place and won the one-litre bottle of Scotch.
The ladies was so excited they gathered in Myrtle Glentworth’s hotel room to celebrate. From there the Rough Patch Quilters went out for pizza and wine and encountered a group of Quilters from Lake Valley. The police said disparaging words was exchanged.
Arnold was visiting when I got the call from a Corporal at the Moose Jaw Police Service. The owner of the Pizza Parlour called the police because of the noise; the singing, and the disparaging words. He added that none of the ‘girls’ was fit to drive.
The Corporal asked me to come and fetch the ‘girl,s, what was left of four the quilts and bring a hundred dollars for the damaged wall.
Arnold rode up with me and drove the tipsy Mrs. Margaret Abernethy-Flaxcombe, her Ford 350 dually and some loaded ladies back. The ladies stayed the night at Margaret’s. Who would have thought Quilting was hazardous?
Lucid 'Lu' Knight, Fern Valley, via the Mossbank Post Office, Saskatchewan
