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Word Wisdom: Sympathy

The latest inspirational column from Rev. Dr. John Kreutzwieser
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Word Wisdom

When you have a friend who is sick in the hospital do you have sympathy? Do you have empathy? Is there a difference? What about terms like pity and compassion? What does it all mean? What is sympathy?

Sympathy comes from the Greek word pathos, meaning feelings or emotions. Sym in Greek means “with.” So, at its root, sympathy refers to sharing similar feelings or emotions with another person. However, in English sympathy tends to include actions of sharing along with the feelings. In the sentence, “She went to her friend for sympathy,” the woman is desiring some action to take place between them. In this case, sympathy is more than empathy, which is the understanding of how they feel without doing anything.

This connection between actions and sympathy has its roots in the Biblical letter of 1st Peter. “Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind.” (1 Peter 3:8) The Greek word sympathais implies participation in the lives of people. It means sharing the same experiences, even sufferings, with others.

To say, “My deepest sympathies go out to the families of the victims,” without actually doing anything is a misuse of the word. This feeling is better described as pity, in the sense that pity is having tender sorrow for one in pain. If you send a letter or card to a person or family that has suffered a loss or grief that would be an action along with your emotional response, which is sympathy.

The Gospel of Matthew records, “Therefore the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his servants. When he began to settle, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents. And since he could not pay, his master ordered him to be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and payment to be made. So the servant fell on his knees, imploring him, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.’ And out of pity for him, the master of that servant released him and forgave him the debt.” (Matthew 18:27) Pity implies sorrow for one is misery. Pity can lead to action, but it is not implied.

Compassion is the desire to help but also does not imply action. Compassion is related to pity as both words are translations of the Greek verb splanchnizomai, meaning an attitude of the inner parts. “When Jesus saw the crowds, he had compassion for them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few; therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into his harvest.” (Matthew 9:36) Compassion refers to the understanding of another’s pain and the desire to do something to help but does not have to entail actions.

The interesting thing about pity is that there can be occasions when pity is mixed with hatred or dislike for the one in pain. The aspect of help or love can be absent from the emotion of pity. One could say, “I pity anyone who has to work in that place.” Or in a phrase like, “He didn’t live to see his daughter grow up, that’s a pity.” We sometimes pity people who are the cause of their own problems and we are not inclined to help.

At times we use sympathy to indicate an emotional or intellectual connection. We might have sympathy with someone’s lot in life, but without any intention of doing anything. That is not a proper use of the word sympathy but is more correctly called pity.

Our community and world would be a much better place if we truly had sympathy for one another. Then we would do more than feel or think or talk but do something to help and make a difference. You can be a blessing to someone by being sympathetic. 

Columnist John Kreutzwieser loves to research words and writes this weekly Word Wisdom column for Moose Jaw Express/MooseJawToday.com.  He has an interest in the usage, origin, and relevance of words for society today. Greek and Latin form the basis of many words, with ancient Hebrew shedding light on word usage.

John would like to know if anyone has a sincere interest in a relevant word that he could possibly research for an upcoming column. If so, please send your requests to wordwisdom2021@gmail.com . Words will be selected according to relevance and research criteria. We cannot confirm that all words will be used.

The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author, and do not necessarily reflect the position of this publication.

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