Marc Legare is a philosopher and motorcycle adventurist.
He has travelled extensively, worked and lived in Australia, US, and across Canada.
He has a varied working career including: Firefighter, Lawyer, Navy, Motorcycle Importer, plus others.
He chose to return to southern Saskatchewan because of his family's deep roots here.
The deterioration of manners in our society is, or ought to be, a seriously significant warning to us. The wholesale and widespread loss of simple courtesy is a telltale sign that we have genuine, deep-rooted problems. Some may contest that this is an over exaggeration. It is anything but. Let us all remind ourselves that escalating conflicts between humans usually start with little pin pricks.
Why do manners exist in the first place? Many think etiquette is altruistic and done for the other person’s pleasure. That may be true in part, but there is another important reason. If you demonstrate polite behaviour, that generally means whatever your views are, they will more likely be listened to and considered by others. Furthermore, reputation is of paramount value. People who have a degree of respect for others in everyday living have a higher reputation than those who are base. As a result, their opinions generally carry more weight. As usual, there is a wise old saying that addresses this directly; "You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar."
Is there much doubt that our society cares less and less about politeness? In its place, are we not caring more and more about making each and every issue a serious enough beef to ignore courtesy toward those with an opposing ethos? It seems that people of every political stripe feel entitled to forgo manners whenever they are waving their banners. Somehow along the way, it has become acceptable to be impertinent and in-your-face abrasive whenever the troubling issue of the day is a social justice concern. This seems especially true for those who consider themselves on the moral high-ground. Nothing is more of an example of this than our mainstream news media circus acts.
Whenever opposing political pundits are corralled together on a news program, it is not a discussion, debate, or even an argument. It is nothing less than a verbal slugfest. In fact, the interruptions usually stop halfway through the "interview" when, by that time, both parties are shouting nonstop, both at the same time. That is as classless as it gets.
How many of us will listen intently to someone who is impudent and interruptive? Few of us have that much stamina. When someone is rude, we tend to care little about what they are saying and all we see is the effrontery itself and ignore their message, even if what they are saying may be valid. In short, a legitimate point, said with insolent audacity or hostility, loses itself behind the unpleasant smoke screen of a distasteful demeanour.
With our society showing increasing disunity, the extensive loss of mutual amiableness is a nightmare waiting to happen. If that is gone, so too is listening. If listening is gone, what is left? That is disturbing when you pause and think about it.
The deterioration of civility in our society is not limited to the political realm. However, that is the realm where it is most costly to us. A lack of courtesy illustrates a perceived lack of respect. When that perception becomes a generally held belief by most, how far are we away from worse behaviours? The complete lack of manners displayed by political hacks and their legions of disciples from both sides of the aisle clearly shows we are anything but healthy.
Perhaps the next time we are attempting to get our point across, we can remind ourselves of the sobering words of Robert Heinlein; “A dying culture invariably exhibits personal rudeness, bad manners, and a lack of consideration for others in minor matters. A loss of politeness and gentle manners, is more significant than is a riot.”
The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author, and do not necessarily reflect the position of this publication.
